Nicole's Journal

2:11PM - almost time to move!!!!!!

so yeah, I move out soon!!!! It would help if fucking sami would let me live here until I am able to move into my new apartment. but noooo I am homeles for like a week so i hve to take all my shit home which is ok I need the break from work and my brain is fried. anyway, I had my last class today of the year!!! yay yay yay!!! I have 3 finals though starting tomorrow..yes thats right I will be soending my saturday morning taking my spanish final!! hey I giess its not that bad I would just be at work if i wasn't taking that stupid final. anyway I can not wait for summer to be here, I really can't. I have so many awesome plans for it including going to az to visit cher/laquish, oh and my child I can't forget my child...hehe. alright well I have a lot to get done so I am gonna get to it before I have to be at work...booooo!!
laaaaate
nikki

Current mood: anxious

12:56AM - GOOD SONG

this song is great and has really good lyrics....just thought i would share it with ya!!


Split Screen Sadness
And I don't know where you went when you left me but
It says here in the water you must be gone by now
I can tell some how
One hand on the trigger of the telephone
Wondering when the call comes
You say it's all right
You got your heart right

Maybe I'll sleep inside my coat and
Wait on your porch til' you come back home
Oh, right
I can't find a flight

We share the sadness
The split screen sadness

Two wrongs make it all alright tonight

All you need is love, is a lie cause
We had love but we still said goodbye
Now we're tired, battered fighters

And it stings when it's nobody's fault
Cause there's nothin' to blame at the drop of your name
It's only the air you took and the breath you left

Maybe I'll sleep inside my coat and
Wait on your porch 'til you come back home
Oh, right
I can't find a flight
So I'll check the weather wherever you are
Cause I wanna know if you can see the stars tonight
It might be my only right

We share the sadness
The split screen sadness
We share the sadness
Split screen sadness

I called
Because
I just
Need to feel you on the line
Don't hang up this time
And I know it was me who called it over but
I still wish you'd fought me 'til your dying day
Don't let me get away

Cause I can't wait to figure out what's wrong with me
So I can say that this is the way that I used to be
There's no substitute for time
Or for the sadness
Split Screen Sadness
We share the sadness

Current mood: peaceful

12:52AM - crappy day!

so today was mostly crap! I discovered that I no longer have my much deserved A in spanish and that now I will have to take the final....on saturday....morning....GREAT...GRAND ...WONDERFUL!!!!! anyway so yeah that sucked. well then i proceeded to run errands. well i took my watch to the jewelry store to get a new battery. well i found out that the battery was fine! the watch is just broken, I just got the damn thing in january and its a fossil....aren't they supposed to be good? well it has an 11 year warranty but I can't find the receipt...SON OF A .....ok well anyway so that sucks too. hmmm well then i typed a shitty draft of my history 200 paper and came home...

what saves my sanity you may ask....

THE CUBS WON YAY YAY YAY!!!

wow, I am a dork! but thats alright!

i will try to have a better day tomorrow, no worries!

nikki

Current mood: cranky

2:36AM - very VERY pissed off

today was an absolutely terrible day!!! I didn't get any thing done that I wanted to...I had to work....and to top it all off I got in a fight with linz....THEN we made up and she was just shitty about 2 hours later....seriously i want to snap!!!
the end
sorry this entry sucks
ok
i'm done
later

nikki

Current mood: pissed off

12:15AM - dreaming of the summer....

ok so I don't know why but I am really looking forward to this summer. I feel like nothing but good can come frome it. I know its good to be this positive but really I don't know where it's coming from!! I don't have to take summer school so thats good. also, i hope, hope, hope....that i can get a new car so thats exciting. hmmm, well there are some people that i will get to see more of. I will LIVE with jen, which is super awesome and will dull the pain of living without my better half linz. uuumm my sisters and I mean all 3. yes thats right I haven't seen katie since the wedding which really sucks so we have made some plans to see eachother in the summer. my daddy and I will get to see eachother!! I seriously will go home to see him more! I promise. my mommy too...we already have plans to get drunk and karoake!! yay us. and last but not least I get to see johnny, and it has been awhile...it's always good to see him, and I can't wait. then there are various other friends that I know i will see and LOVE!! ie lili..hopefully connie...sara...and maybe some shayla shay??? geez i miss my friends. i really need this summer!! WOW well my meds are kickin in and this codeine in my cough syrup is KICKIN MY ASS, so i best get some sleep

till i write again

nikki

Current mood: sick

12:48AM - my boobs!!!

You Have Ample Boobs!

No doubt about it, you have one hell of a rack

No matter what you wear, you're a walking boob attack

Other girls might get jealous - and say your boobs are fake

But you smile knowing their boyfriends are yours to take!



What's Good About Your Boobs?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

11:54PM - nooo pants!!!

You Should Wear Nothing! NOTHING?!?!?! There are no limits or boundaries for you. No pants, no clothes, whatever. But, hey, if you're going to get arrested, this is definitely the way to go. </font> Find out which No Pants Day outfit YOU should wear! No Pants Day is May 7th, 2004. To find out more about No Pants Day, visit www.NoPantsDay.com

Current mood: crazy

9:56PM - procrastination is like.....

so yeah all i seem to do is wait to the last minute. however, that changes nothing because since ipush everything back I still have something that i have to do...does that make sense...AHHHHHHHHHHH school just needs to be over. 3 weeks nik...3 WEEKS. there we go that was my written pep talk. go me. anyway how is the rest of my life hmmmmmm. good question!
well.....let me see. Justin called me after like a million years. well 2 weeks but still thats a while. I'm not really sure if we will hang out as much anymore, especially since i am not gonna use the fake, and the summer when i am 21, yeah well i will have to think on that now won't i.
mmm k what else..oh!! blake called me last night, we had a pretty good talk about easter and stuff but that was all. no fights! we may be friends one day...we MAY.
vince called too...yeah thats all i have to say about that..really he doesn't get the fact that being nice now doesn't change a lot of things like JENNY BERMAN. nothing changes that. and although now that doesn't matter he acts like we should hang out every day and I simply can not hang out with him. nope i can't do it.
what else what else...oh well ben and i found his boss online as a prosecuted sex offender.wow thats great. ben works with a sexual predator a GAY one. he's kinda scared. watch that behind ben!!

well thats about all nothing exciting here...school sucks and we all know this...
laaaaate
nikki

Current mood: working

5:28PM - school is soooooo stressful!!! seriously!!

anyway...it really is....due this week
mon: spanish composition...oh and we had a quiz that day too.

tue: direct observation reports for educational psychology....5 of them...

wed: I have a government test.

thur: narrative background essay for my research paper

friday: 7 page governmant paper on the presidential election

in between all of this I have a million regular assigments...oh and work!! never forget work!!! grrrrrrrrrr

anyway other than that I am doing really good! I have had some great conversations lately and that makes me really happy!! yay me!! hehe. ok anyway I am really tired and overworked but now it is time for me to work out. wish me luck with that.....


laaaaaaate

nikki

Current mood: busy

11:25PM - here i am NOT studying......

cause that seems to be all i have been doing! that and writing papers...grrrr why must teachers wait till the last minute to have important papers assigned. oh wait it's probably just me waiting till the last minute to DO THEM..hehe. anyway school- is busy and crazy but what are you gonna do. most of my grades are pretty solidly in place anyway. even though i have a solid b in spanish, i really should have an a. that is the same as last semester though. i just don't even try, barely do any of the work...study for nothing and come out with a b in the class when most of the class has to try for a b or even a c. i guess i make out ok huh? i got a lot done today. it was the second day in a row that i spent at the library!! and besides that i went to class, after stopped in my teachers' offices and found out grade situations. they were good. eh so yeah library...then working out then back here where i am currently taking a break from studying. but yeah hopefully i will do good on this test tomorrow. oh and the quiz in spanish!!! grrrrrr. ok back to studying!!!

wait...ps...my emotions are so mixed right now..not really just...grrr I refuse to write about this!! ask me if you really wanna know!!!
k laaaaaate

nikki

Current mood: accomplished

10:47PM - and depression hits....

so yeah I have problems emotionally when the weater changes. I guess that a lot of people do, but still i am in the dumps, knowing others may be feeling shitty too doesn't help matters any. I won't regale you with my horendous saturday night at all, merely for the fact that I don't want to relive it. sigh....lets just say that i cried myself to sleep. oh but a big shout out to randy for talking to me about it and being a better friend than i really thought he was. i guess sometimes people can surprise you for the good as well as the bad. anyway so last night was shitty, there really is no getting around that. friday night though. WOW, seriously!!! I am so happy that I got a chance to spend some quality time with sara!! it was about damn time. we were WASTED. kyle came with us to mike cooks party and he wouldn't dance with us so he left early after feeling like we were ignoring him which we soooo weren't!!!!!! anyway sara and i still lived it up and had a grand ole time that didn't end until the wee hours of the morning. I did miss mollie though, she is still laying kinda low after the whole ticket thing. besides all this craziness the weekend was as usual at least when it came to work. I just have emotional dilemmas....

I just don't want to hurt anymore and I have been trying to cover it up for so long that it just kinda overflows now....and i can't stop it. I am sick and tired of how a certain gender treats me, and i don't know what to do. why do all the guys i know tell me how fuckin great i am and then follow it up with something shitty that they do to me!! actions speak louder than words, don't they know that! grrrr anyway I am rambling. I am strong....and i will survive, like the mighty aretha...hehe there i go making jokes about lifes hardships, evidence enough that i can deal!
hang in there nic...

nikki

Current mood: satisfied

2:20PM - just a survey that I stole from linz!!

I was bored and I saw that linz had this in her journal so here is mine!!!



I AM: not looking forward to going to psych in a little bit....
I WANT: a million dollars!
I HAVE: a fish named nemo!!! (he's linz's too)
I WISH: i was thinner
I HATE: worms!
I MISS: highschool
I FEAR: the dark especially after a scary movie!
I HEAR: the song, "I don't need you"
I SEARCH: for my brain!
I WONDER: if i am gonna be able to get all the classes I want next semester
I LOVE: my friends!!!
I ACHE: to be loved

I ALWAYS: make people laugh
I AM NOT: tall
I DANCE:to EVERY song, and mostly with linz...
I SING: the words to every song cause I always know them!
I CRY: when others can't see me and sometimes when they can...
I AM NOT ALWAYS: happy
I WRITE: in this journal to get my thoughts down
I WIN: at life!
I LOSE: at life!
I CONFUSE: EVERYONE
I NEED: money, a new car, and a boyfriend!
I SHOULD: do my homework, work on my schedule...

x. father thinks I never: do anything wrong!
x. mother thinks I am: a good student
x. my boyfriend/girlfriend thinks I am: don't have one but if i did they would think i am the shit!! cause i am, lets face it.
x. makes you happy: spring, summer, baseball, the cubs, candy!
x. upsets you: ex-bfs, when my friends aer upset

yes or no...
x. you keep a diary: this one
x. you like to cook: haha cooking, whats that?? ask my wife lindsey...
x. you have a secret you have not shared with anyone: not unless it's a secret even i don't know!
x. you're in love: nope and it sucks!
x. you set your watch a few minutes ahead: yeah but then i just subtract that out when i look at my alarm or my watch...so i guess it really does me no good. i am still late to EVERYTHING!!
x. you bite your fingernails: no, i cut them way too short for their to be anything to bite anyways.
x. you believe in love: yes!! above all things I believe in love!!

Who is...?
the prettiest/hottest female you know: me...duh!!! no that was a lie. hmm not sure...
the weirdest person you know: besides myself i would have to say linz
the Loudest Person you Know: LINDSEY ERIN MCGEHEE!!!
the Sexiest Person you Know: me, me, me...hahahaha..once again no idea!
Your close friend:Jen,Linz, cher and Lil!
The Person that Knows the Most about you: see previous answer..
your Crush?: your mom! hahahaha!! no I kinda might have one but he doesn't deserve mentioning yet....
Most Boring Teacher: educational psychology teacher...sorry if you ever read this mrs. ekdale!! wait i'm not sorry you are making me write 5 papers for your crazy ass, so you do suck!

2. Do You...?
take a shower everyday: yes
have a(any) crush(es): as i mentioned before his name shall not be written...
think/know you've been in love:yes
want to get married: yes
have any tattoos/where?: 1 on my lower back, right side. its a fairy, and shes pretty just like me!
piercings/where?: 4. ears, tongue, belly button
get motion sickness: yeah and i haaaate it!
think you're a health freak: haha, well i just ate wendys so i am gonna say no.
like thunderstorms: yes!! unless i am driving in one then i don't!

WHEN YOU SEE THIS NAME YOU THINK Of
Ryan: seacrest...sightings...
Drew: carey
Stephanie: me!!! i mean my fake
Heather: a girl that i grew up with
Aaron: richardson from hat world...little bitch!
Amy: from randolph 3
Will: my uncle or my cousins real name!
Paul: my cousin, or my friend paul from the mall, or even my crazy ex paul..wow i know a lot of pauls...laura is dating a paul too...weird
Eve: the rapper
John: fleming
Lauren: my little cousin, or my sexy friend lauren
Dave: thomas
Justin: as linz would say lube justin! but his real name is justin marti

CUDDLE OR MAKE OUT? Both at the same time!
CHOCOLATE MILK, OR HOT CHOCOLATE? hmm they each have their occassions
MILK, DARK, OR WHITE CHOCOLATE? Mmmmm white chocolate…
VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE? chocolate

( IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU.... )

CRIED? no
HELPED SOMEONE? yes
BOUGHT SOMETHING? food
GOTTEN SICK? no
GONE TO THE MOVIES? no, rented one though
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? no

SAID "I LOVE YOU"? yes
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER? no
TALKED TO AN EX? yes
MISSED AN EX? yes
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? yes
TALKED TO SOMEONE YOU CRUSH ON? yes
HAD A SERIOUS TALK? yes
MISSED SOMEONE? yes
HUGGED SOMEONE? yes
FOUGHT WITH YOUR PARENTS? No
FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND? no


Would You Ever..
1. Eat a bug? sick no!
2. Bungee jump? no
3. Hang glide? yes
4. Kill someone? in self defense or defense of a loved one yes.
5. Have sex with someone you don't love? i'll try not to....hhhaha no i won't
6. Kiss someone of the same sex? hhhmm does it count if neither of you remember?
7. Have sex with someone of the same sex? no, ew
8. Parachute from a plane? no
9. Walk on hot coals? no
10. Go out with someone for their looks? it wouldn't last long now ould it...
11. For their reputation? no
12. Be a vegetarian? no
13. Wear plaid with stripes? we all know what a fashion guru i am come one...jk i never care about matching...ever
14. IM a stranger: no
15. Sing karaoke? Hell, yea
16. Get drunk off your ass? sure
17. Shoplift? only on accident, and only if it was eyeliner....
18. Run a red light? yes
19. Star in a porn video? no
20. Dye your hair blue? no
21. Be on Survivor? yes
22. Wear makeup in public? Yes…
23. NOT wear makeup in public? yes
24. Cheat on a test? no
25. Make someone cry? yeah, i have before..wow i am a bitch!
26. Call your math teacher a motherfucker? yeah if they deserved it
27. Kick a baby? who does that..no i wouldn't!
28. Date someone more than ten years older than you? maybe, depends i guess, i did 8 years why not 10...
29. Cuss out a priest? No
30. Take a job as a janitor? yeah
31. Stay up all through the night? yeah



~09 things you're looking forward to:
1) summer
2) living with jen
3) turning 21 (my bday is may 12th write that down people!)
4) my tax return!
5) the end of the semester
6) seeing my little sister in joseph!!
7) cubs game with my daddy!
8) drunk karoake with my mom!
9) being done with this survery!

~02 movies you could watch over and over again:
1) Moulin Rouge
2) billy madison
3) the labyrinth

~01 person you would spend the rest of your life with:
1) guess i haven't met him yet huh? rub it in why don't you....

Current mood: bored

12:30AM - weekend update...including my run in with the law!!!!!

so yeah my weekend was pretty boring. as you have probably read i stayed in on friday....however then there was saturday.....

let me break it down for ya....

10:30 get off of work....
11:00 head to jujus to meet up with mollie
11:30-12:00 drink it up at jujus...

then the drama...

so at like 12:15 we are gettin ready to shake our bootys at club 110...as soon as we walk in the joint we notice that some cops have decided to join in on the fun! yeah so as we are chillin there the cops start checkin ids everywhere! yeah so i walk to the dance floor hoping that they will stay away from me there. well they sure didn't. a cop walks up to me and says
cop-hey miss can i see your id?
me- yeah sure officer! (give it to him)
cop- ok, thank you miss have a nice night....

ok so WOW I am lucky right?! and i shoulda been smart and left right then riiiight! yes I shoulda but my dumb ass wanders the bar looking for mollie. so the SAME cop comes up to me at the bar and asks me if he can see the is in better light...again i give him my fake...

cop- miss i couldn't see out there can i see your id again...
me- yeah sure...
cop- ok...this is NOT .....a very good picture of you...
me- yeah i had a kinda crappy day...worked a double...
cop- i understand..well have a great night stephanie!
me-yeah thanks...

ok so then i got the fuck outta dodge called mollie, only to find out she was NOT as lucky and got $1,000 dollars in fines. holy shit am i glad that i didn't get caught! I can not afford that shit! yeah it was $250 in possesion of alcohol by a minor, $250 for consumption of a minor, and $500 for possesion of a fake id. WOW!! so yeah basically poor moll has picked up every shift known to man at work and I just feel bad that she got caught. I think i just may wait till i turn 21 to try to go to the bars again...fo sho...

well thats the story..i went home thanked my lucky stars and went to bed!

the end!!

nikki

Current mood: thankful

1:54AM - sweet....boring..... friday night!!!!

so yeah it's a friday night and yet again i am sitting here doing nothing, which is fine by me. honestly I think it's kinda nice to revel in the calm before the storm. i work a double tomorrow and of course sunday as well. at least I can make pretty good money doing that...well I hope! johnny says that I never post anything about him but umm he never talks to me really anymore so i don't know what I am supposed to write!! well i do get to see him in the summer so that should be super fun! i can't wait johnny!!!! ok so there is his shout out!
hhhmmm what else to write.....
boy situation...there is none...haha. I am living the single life and loving it. i need nicole time and i am getting it so yay for me.
friend situation... really good!!! linz and jen are busting ass on school work and I really proud of them!!! the ruby tuesday is as good as ever. I am sad though cause a bunch of people are quitting. nooooo not allowed. nicole doesn't wanna pick up the slack!!

speaking of work! interesting story....
so nicole shows up tp work today and her card won't swipe. the computer kept saying...employee does not exist!! hell naw!! so the managers all took turns trying to figure out what was going on. it turns out I WAS TERMINATED IN THE COMPUTER!!! yeah thats right the computer fired me. i was given a date of termination and everything!!! waaaa!!! hehe well then we had to rehire me in the computer. weird huh?? ah well i work there again. but for about an hour i was jobless kinda! haha!

ok well i don't have any more stupid work stories tonight...besides that when i was bored tonight i booty danced with the other girls in the kitchen...thus club ruby tuesday was born!!! yay!!!

haha ok i am a rere and kinda sick of typing so i am calling it quits....
later kids

nikki

Current mood: tired

7:50PM - Aunt Linz

so baby sadie was born today and I hear that she is VERY cute!!! congrats Linz!!!! you are now an auntie!!! whoo hoo!!!

in my life uumm nothin really. lots of homework..papers...tests..you know the usual school things. I have the next couple days off of work which is super sweet...BUT i do work all 5 weekend shifts so that is pretty shitty but what are ya gonna do, right?

plans for the weekend..besides work...none really. linz says that she won't go out with me thursday(tomorrow) but I am boycotting that decision....I WILL BREAK HER DOWN...hahahaha

ok well back to spanish I go...

adios

nikki

Current mood: okay

12:35AM - just updatin....

so yeah,
I really don't know why but I have been feeling real sad lately. do you ever look in the mirror and not like what you see...physically and otherwise? well i did today. i looked and said to myself.."self...you are too fat and unhappy..." cause i am. I need to rearrange priorities in my life for real...grrr.

on a happy note linz is gonna be an aunt soon ..her sister will probably have the baby sometime this week!!!! how exciting for her..I'll keep y'all updated on that. how sad...my happy news isn't even MY happy news...its my best friends...eh whatever same person right!!

I bought a new shirt today and its super cute!!! I thought i deserved to buy myself something perty! since i was in a bad moos and all. school is goin ok i guess..I can't wait for this semester to be over...waaaay too many papers though. I will tell you that much. ahh the frustrations!!!! haha.

well i will update with current events more often I promise linz....no worries..haha. I know you were worried....

nikki

Current mood: cranky

12:21AM - weekend with the sister!

hey hey,

so yeah laura was here and I was loving her of course. I had a party for her since she can't go to the bars and lots of ruby tuesday people came. It was really fun and yet weird that people were in my apartment. I was like break nothing!!! no one did and everyone behaved. we played card games, listened to music and basically had a blast. everyone was like laura is so much more quiet than you....but come on we all knew that i always play the role of the obnoxiuos one!!! so yeah it was a really good time! the next day at work sucked except for the fact that my dad, sister and sisters bf's family came in and ate at the ruby tuesday! and the best part was the 70 dollar tip my dad left me! anyway, so i had mollie, bo, julie, and eric over last night. they were all fun and we looked at pictuers from the weekend and laughed at how drunk we were in ALL of them...I miss my sister and dad already but what are ya gonna do right?

well that was my end of spring break..now school begins again....and I AM NOT READY by any means...wish me luck!

nikki

Current mood: groggy

12:30PM - what a GREAT night!!!

hey hey hey,
so yeah I had the day off last night and I thought that I would have a really boring day. about 9 I called abby at work and asked her what she was gonna do for the night. she told me that they were all on their way to chilis and then probably mickeys. well i went there and it was bo, abby, justin, mandy and I. we all sat there and talked, they ate and then we decided on a game plan. the plan was that justin would buy us beer like the good coach he was...haha. well we met up at his place with his friend scott. we all drank and played asshole it was really fun. then mandy called us and told us that we should go to mickeys....well I was already drunk and I knew it. so I told everyone that I knew that I was not good to drive. justin and scott drove instead!! That turned out to be a real good idea cause I only got more beligerent! I am sounding like an alcoholic huh? anyway so we got to mickeys and only mellisa and greg were there.haha mickey and everyone..including mickeys dad were all at the bar..haha. yes mickeys dad, carlos! well they came back and big tall eric was with them....and i was loving him cause he is one of my favorite friends from work. mickey introduced me to his dad and his dad told me that I have huge boobs.....haha..his dad...I laughed for like 5 straight minutes. well eventually I had justin drive me back to my car....but that was much later....what a night!! abby was great! I love her...I can't wait until this roll is developed!! there are gonna be some cute pictures!! I have like 3 or 4 more to take....grrrr I wish I had taken those last night too. sigh...ok well I have a lot to do before work tonight! including cleaning up the apartment. its so hard to stay clean when you are never here!!! well i guess i am here long enough to make a mess...huh?

ps anyone that is still at isu and would like to see a super awesome beatles cover band on saturday, let me know!!! they are called american english and last time i saw them it was with lil!!! anyway...holla at me if y ou wanna see em...

nikki

Current mood: ecstatic

10:23PM - tired

hey,
I am way too tired to write much...but I just wanted to say that if you ever have kids and take them to a restaraunt do NOT allow them to make a huuuge mess and then leave a shitty tip...I am not your maid....grrrr. yeah as you can tell very shitty day at work....

I miss my friends still.....

on a happy not I make more and more friends at work every day..julie was a blast last night!! I hope that i continue to like everyone as much as i do now!

night...

nikki

Current mood: tired

11:53PM - i don't like working all weekend

hey,
so yeah about this work bullshit!! doubles in a row always suck...but what sucks more is that when i am not working I come to the realization that all my friends went home for spring break....and the even luckier ones went on fun trips....sigh. so when i am at work I am tired and don't want to be there. when i am at home i am lonely and don't want to be there. what is a girl to do???

oh yeah about jerk boy who pretended to not know me...well apparently he doesn't even remember seeing me that night....so i guess that i can't be that pissed..but whatever!! I'm over it anyway..haha.

I think dybala wants to be friends again....we'll see about that...at least we will see how long that lasts till he starts being shady again...

hmmm what else....i dunno linz is gone....jen is gone...all my other friends are not here...sigh...so looonely....come home friends!!!

Current mood: lonely